


Curiosity Killed the Cat

by Jean_C_Pepper



Category: Batman (Movies - Nolan)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-04-14
Updated: 2011-04-14
Packaged: 2017-10-18 02:04:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 519
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/183775
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jean_C_Pepper/pseuds/Jean_C_Pepper





	Curiosity Killed the Cat

Alfred sighed with satisfaction as he got on the elevator to go to Bruce's penthouse. The Manor had been rebuilt some time ago, but Bruce still kept the penthouse and stayed there sometimes. He had told Alfred that he would be entertaining and to not be disturbed for the evening.  
“I probably won't be going to work, either, Alfred,” he said meaningfully.  
It was after ten. Surely Master Bruce was up and around by now. At any rate, Lucius had sent over some papers that needed to be signed immediately. Alfred had no choice but to track Bruce down.  
Alfred was happy that Bruce was entertaining someone. Perhaps it was a sign that he was finally over Rachel. Alfred wondered who it could be. Bruce hadn't shown any interest in any one woman.

As Alfred got off the elevator, he wondered who the lucky woman could be. In the large dining area, he could see that the stereo was turned on and furniture pushed aside, as if two people had been dancing. Further, he saw an empty bottle of sparkling cider and two dirty glasses. Alfred knew that Bruce didn't drink and apparently neither did his lady friend. As he moved through the apartment, Alfred could see more evidence that Bruce had had a very romantic evening. He could see a tray in the living area that contained the remains of what appeared to have been chocolate covered strawberries and oysters-on-the-half shell as well as a pitcher of what appeared to be lemonade. In the hallway outside of Bruce's room, Alfred saw Bruce's black sweater.

Alfred rapped lightly on the door feeling guilty. Lucius had been insistent that these documents needed Bruce's immediate signature. When he didn't hear an answer, he lightly opened the door. What he saw took his breath away....

Bruce's bed was ringed with the rest of their discarded clothing. On the night table, the bookshelves and the small table were candles. There was another tray loaded with the remnants of what appeared to have been more chocolate covered fruit.  
Bruce was laying in bed holding his lover close. The man that Bruce was holding was the Joker. The green haired fiend hadn't even bothered to take his makeup off and it was patchy on his skin. His head was on Bruce's chest and Bruce had both arms wrapped tightly around the Joker. Both men were deeply asleep. On the night table, in addition to the candles were a jar of lube and a washcloth. Alfred shuddered.

As he peered deeper into the room, the door squeaked and Bruce gave a start before sitting up and looking at Alfred.  
“Well...shit,” he muttered, because really what else could he say?

Alfred backed silently out of the room. This was some horrible nightmare come to life. A horribly unfunny April Fool's joke. He gazed at the remnants of Bruce's romantic evening with disgust as he headed for the elevator and the Manor. He realized belatedly that he had dropped the papers in his shock. Well fine. Bruce could sign them and send them over to Wayne Enterprises.


End file.
